If this week has taught me anything it’s that being honest sucks.
I work at my school as a campus tour guide. I love my school with all my heart but there are somethings I don’t like about it. One thing in particular that I don’t like about it is the food. I’d rather eat pb&j everyday in my room than eat in the dining hall. (It’s actually what I have been doing.) Well someone on my tour asked me how the food was. I froze. How can I be honest and polite?
It’s a tricky line to cross. I told her honestly I wasn’t the biggest fan. I played up the fact that there are plenty of places to eat on campus. I didn’t really sugar coat it but it’s okay because she would be a transfer. If it were a freshman I might have answered differently. It’ll be interesting to see how the rest of the semester plays out.
Now what if we lived in a society where our motives where written on our shirts? As I’ve discussed, flirting has become a bit of an unseen difficulty. I can’t really be coy so I’m cutting straight to the chase. Here is what I call honest flirting.
This weekend I also went on a leadership retreat. One of the activities involved honesty from my end and it was hard. There were about 80 people in the room and written on paper were different values like major, organization, religion, appearance, sexuality, and family and friends. We were asked questions and told to stand under what fit the question. Some questions were “what brings you the most joy, what brings you the most stress, what do you feel like you are judged about the most, and what are you most uncomfortable with.”
I had done this same activity freshman year in one of my classes and I wanted to be honest, and I couldn’t. I couldn’t bring myself to be honest and stand under certain things. This time was different. I took a deep breathe and stood alone under “sexuality” for a few of the questions. It was hard until one or two other girls actually walked over to join me. One told me it was out of support which was nice. It just felt weird knowing 75 other people were staring right at me. I guess it’s just a small price to pay for being “honest.” I’m glad I did it.
Someone this week asked me if I thought they were fat. Mr. Honesty, as he called me, I gave him the truth. We’re still on speaking terms.
I had a job interview this week to be an orientation leader and it went well. A question they had asked me was “What do you foresee the hardest part of the job being?” I told them honestly that I thought it would be hard to wake up everyday enthusiastic about getting others to be enthusiastic. They applauded me on my honesty. With that being said, I made it to the second round of interviews and I was just myself!
This week has taken a bit of a toll of some of the relationships I hold close but it’s also taught me a lot. I have a lot I need to work on. I need to focus on letting the people that matter to me know that. I can’t just assume relationships will work without work. Just because I’m being honest doesn’t mean I have the right to be a jerk. It’s hard to balance it but it’s something I’m working on.